Actress Aubrey Plaza, whose first pregnancy was publicly confirmed at
the April 16 premiere of the film Kevin via the red-carpet showing
of a visible baby bump, arrived in Helen, Georgia, in a silver 2024
Volvo XC40 rental with Georgia temporary tags, at approximately 1:47
p.m. Saturday, April 18. She parked the vehicle in the Municipal Lot
Three parking lot on Edelweiss Strasse, paid the $6 day-parking rate
in cash at the self-service kiosk, and crossed Bruckenstrasse on foot.
She was wearing, per four separate eyewitness accounts and the one
photograph this publication has obtained with appropriate consent
(via a through-window shot at Kuhn's Dirndl-Emporium), a black baseball
cap with no visible logo, large sunglasses, a medium-gray pullover
sweatshirt, dark denim, and white New Balance 2002R sneakers. She
did not attempt, so far as any observer has noted, to conceal her
identity beyond the cap and sunglasses. Two of the four eyewitnesses
recognized her immediately. The other two were tourists from Ohio and
said they had "not looked that carefully."
Her first stop was the Helen Welcome Center at 200 Bruckenstrasse.
She signed the visitor log at 1:54 p.m. under the legible name "A.
Plaza." In the "Purpose of visit" column — a free-text field — she
wrote, in a clear cursive: "Quiet month." In the "Where are you from?"
column, she wrote: "Elsewhere."
Welcome Center Director Winslow Bach, who was present behind the
information desk and had, per his own account, recognized her
immediately, recovered from a 30-second pause and then, per his own
account, said the following sentence: "Welcome to Helen. We can offer
a map."
Ms. Plaza accepted the map.
The stated request
According to Mr. Bach — who this publication interviewed Saturday
evening — Ms. Plaza's follow-up inquiry was unusual, even by the
standards of the Welcome Center's occasional celebrity visitors.
"What she said, and I am reading from a note I wrote down at 1:56
p.m.," Mr. Bach said, "was: 'Is there something like the edge of the
country without actually being on the edge.'"
Mr. Bach paused. "I am not, as a general matter, good with geography
riddles."
He said he had recommended the Edge of the Civilized World Overlook,
an informally named pullout at the top of the Anna Ruby Falls access
road (elevation 2,180 feet MSL, per the U.S. Geological Survey
topographic series), which offers an unobstructed view of
approximately fourteen Northeast Georgia mountain ridges receding
toward the Tennessee state line. It is not, Mr. Bach conceded, "on the
edge of the country in any literal sense. It is, however, named for
that feeling."
Ms. Plaza accepted the recommendation. She drove there. Per one
Forest Service volunteer stationed at the lower Anna Ruby Falls
parking lot, a Volvo XC40 with Georgia temporary tags arrived at 2:31
p.m. and departed at 3:09 p.m.
The third article
This is Ms. Plaza's third appearance in the pages of this publication
in nine days. The first, an April 9 culture brief by Dr. Wilhelm
Brüning, noted the resemblance between Ms. Plaza's on-screen affect
and the face Helen locals make when a tourist asks where to find "a
real Bavarian experience." The second, an April 14 listicle of "Nine
Helen Souvenirs Aubrey Plaza Would Probably Buy," was, per the
editorial board's subsequent review, "probably a stretch." Saturday's
arrival — unannounced, undiscussed, unrequested by this publication —
constitutes, as the dek notes, her third consecutive appearance.
No member of this publication has, at any point, contacted Ms. Plaza's
agent, manager, attorney, or publicist. No outreach of any kind has
been made. Ms. Plaza has, in each of her three appearances, simply
turned up — twice metaphorically, once literally.
Editorial Page Editor Edmund Crowe, asked Saturday evening whether
this publication had a protocol for a repeat unannounced celebrity
subject, said: "We do not. We are considering the development of one.
In the interim, we would ask Ms. Plaza to consider whether this town
is, in fact, offering her the quiet month she is seeking."
The dirndl
At 5:42 p.m. Saturday, Ms. Plaza returned to downtown Helen. She
entered Kuhn's Dirndl-Emporium at 1036 Main Street and spent
approximately 35 minutes on the premises, per the shop's internal
closed-circuit footage. Proprietor Elisabeth Kuhn — who, per her
earlier work this week on the commemorative dirndl for the 69-year-
old Berlin Zoo gorilla at the Welcome Center — has described Saturday
as "the busiest dirndl sizing week of a forty-two-year career."
Ms. Plaza selected, per Ms. Kuhn's account, a "traditional alpine-
green mid-length" in a size Ms. Kuhn declined to disclose, citing the
confidentiality of all fitting-room measurements. Ms. Plaza paid, in
cash, a total of $389.00. The dirndl, which required minor alteration
at the bodice to accommodate the first-trimester adjustment, is due
Tuesday. Ms. Plaza has indicated she intends to be in Helen on
Tuesday.
This publication wishes Ms. Plaza her quiet month. We intend no
further coverage unless she writes one of our articles, directly,
herself.
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